What is complaining, anyway?

Three weeks into Lent, I can tell you that giving up complaining is much harder than giving up dessert.

I can also tell you that some people don’t seem to understand what I meant by complaining. In that vein, maybe it’d be helpful to start with what I don’t consider to be complaining:

1. Describing something negative that happened (e.g., “Traffic seemed worse today, it took longer to get work”)
2. Having a negative opinion about (a.k.a. judging) food that you ate (e.g., “I never thought I’d say this but I think that pork belly was too fatty”)
3. Sharing said opinion with your waiter (e.g., “This hot-and-sour soup is kind of cold”)
4. Telling your coworker of what you perceive to be a safety hazard (e.g., “Those glass walls are awfully close together…be careful when you’re walking around with your food”)
5. Sharing a prayer request because something is bothering you (e.g., “Can you pray for me? Been feeling down lately since I’ve been working so much and haven’t had time to enjoy the steam room at the gym”)

Oxford English Dictionary’s definition of complain is to “express dissatisfaction or annoyance about something,” which, okay, I guess could include all of the above, but I was talking more about giving up the spirit (or attitude) of complaining. It’s okay to acknowledge negative circumstances in your life as long as it doesn’t become your focus, you’re maintaining a positive attitude, and/or you’re actively trying to fix the situation.

Alternatively, I suppose I could become one of those crazy people in the cable/DirectTV commercials who pretend everything is perfect all of the time…but that’s just not me.

PS. Quiz: of the 5 non-complaints above, which have I actually said?

PPS. After Lent is over I’ll be sharing an abridged list of complaints I have refrained (or attempted to refrain) from making.