Lessons in Expectation Setting at an All-Inclusive Resort
“The thing about all-inclusive resorts is that the food isn’t very good,” Karen said. “And you don’t really leave the resort since you want to take advantage of the free food, so you might as well be in Florida.”
I knew all of this, and didn’t mind. After all, the most important part of traveling is the people you’re spending time with. If it’s the right group of people you can have fun anywhere — whether it’s at a hostel or a 5-star resort.
It was my first time going to Mexico and an all-inclusive resort, and I was excited. The pictures looked beautiful, and all I wanted to do was relax by the pool and chill out with friends. I was hoping we’d play some beach volleyball and board games, but even if not I’d be okay with it.
Perhaps just as important as the people you’re with are the expectations you have. Having done some research before the trip, I knew that even though we were staying at a resort by the beach, it wasn’t a swimmable beach, as Cabo beaches in general aren’t very swimmable. It wasn’t ideal, but I figured it was fine for a first time visit, and I was happy to just get away (this was right after I had Covid).
With these expectations in mind, I was content with the food and pool situation at Marquis Los Cabos. Not only that, but out of everyone who went, apparently I was the most content with the resort food (I know…I was surprised too). Some friends had been to other resorts before, and said that Marquis had the worst food compared to the others. Some didn’t realize that the beach right next to the resort would not be swimmable, so they were a bit disappointed.
On the flip side, I was not prepared for the tipping in Mexico. Nic let us know a few days before the trip that it’s proper etiquette to tip servers when they bring you drink and food orders, and to be honest, I was kind of annoyed. Apparently all-inclusive resorts do not include tips, and you’re expected to tip. Moreover, it’s “customary” to leave a 10-20% tip at restaurants in Mexico.
On our last night we went out to Cabo San Lucas, and it was there that I learned “customary” really meant “required.” A friend had recommended The Office on the Beach, so we went there for our last dinner. It was nice, with prices to match — a large bottle of water was $5 and the entree I got was $30. When it came time to pay the bill, we added a 5% tip since we were ignorant of the tipping culture, and the menu prices seemed to reflect more than a living wage. But when our waiter saw how much we were tipping, he sternly told us we were expected to tip 15-20% for a group of 7. The whole experience left a bad taste in my mouth, and reminded me why I hate tipping in general. All of this could have been avoided had the restaurant explicitly outlined their expectations on the menu instead of berating us afterwards for not tipping enough.
The last dinner (and tipping) aside, we had a great time in Cabo. One night we even had a spontaneous dance party at the resort following an acrobatic show. The DJ was playing music, a few people started dancing, and then more people joined in. It was super fun, and it was like dancing at a friend’s wedding. There was something magical about how spontaneous and unexpected it was, and I love that we had the space and time to go with the flow and just be in the moment.
Reflecting on the trip as a whole, it’s interesting how expectations both positively and negatively impacted my experience. Is the lesson to have low / no expectations so you’re always pleasantly surprised? Maybe, but that seems both simplistic and unrealistic — you’re going to have expectations, whether you know what they are or not. On the other hand, while it can be helpful to do research ahead of time so you know what to expect, it’s not possible to prepare for everything.
Ultimately, it’s probably best to focus on 1) why you’re going in the first place, and 2) what vacations are for. For me, Cabo was a celebration of friendship, as it was the first extended vacation I had taken with Nic and Claire. I wanted to go to Cabo with them not only because I enjoyed their company, but also to get to know them better, as there’s something special about traveling together that deepens friendships.
With regard to what vacations are for, I want to add to what I’ve written previously — trips like this one are an opportunity to learn more:
- About yourself: what you like, what you don’t like, and what your expectations are.
- About your friends: what they enjoy doing, and what their expectations are.
- About the world: what the local customs are, and how much to tip in each country.
What are your expectations when you travel?
People don’t work on their feet serving people because it’s a living wage. They need to eat and the best suited job ain’t cutting it, or the server does not have the requisite skill for something better. Tips, especially from Americans, are expected. I always give 20% minimum (unless tips are included) and more for greater effort. At all-inclusives, those servers and bartenders LIVE for tips… it is a good practice and will always get you attention. As my mother said, “if you can’t afford to tip, don’t go out.”