How *not* to pay for a group meal

A few months ago I was having a meal with a group of friends, and the time came to Pay the Bill. Thankfully it was a family style meal, so there was none of the “How much was my dish again?” or “Let’s calculate the cost of the appetizers, add on tip and tax, split that between all of us, and then add on the cost for our own entrées and drinks.” Still, since there were 8 of us, it was a bit unwieldy to give the restaurant 8 credit cards and ask them to split the bill.

So the question came down to: who can pay with cash and who is paying with credit card? Ideally everybody pays with cash and we’re good to go, but unfortunately there was That Guy in our group. You know, That Guy Who Always Pays For Group Meals With His Credit Card (And Takes Everybody Else’s Cash). 

The conversation went something like this –

Friend: Who needs to pay with credit card?

That Guy: Why don’t I pay with my credit card and you guys can pay me back? That’s easier.

Friend: Do you have PayPal?

That Guy: I do but I hate it…I use Square Cash, does anybody have that?

Everyone: No.

That Guy: Well it’s pretty easy to use, just give me your e-mail address,  install the app on your phone, input your debit card number, and you’re done.

Friend: Does anybody else with PayPal want to pay with credit card [since people actually uses PayPal]?

<Nobody answers, I’m assuming because nobody wanted to further complicate the situation>

That Guy: Okay, it’s settled then, I can pay and everybody pays me back with actual cash or Square Cash. 

I was…surprised at the exchange, for the following reasons:

1. It’s not “easier” if you pay with credit card and have everybody pay you back…it’s just as easy for anybody else to pay for the bill and for the rest of us to pay them back.
2. Yes, it’s nice to get points or miles or cash back by using your credit card (2% at restaurants!), but maybe consider that other people want to do that too (especially if they don’t have enough cash).  
3. If you didn’t have enough cash, it seemed like That Guy was insisting on a payment method (Square Cash) that none of us use, versus being open about letting us use PayPal to pay him back.

Unfortunately this seems like a common #firstworldproblem in Silicon Valley, but I am fortunate to have been blessed with friends who know The Drill, which I have outlined below. (And if anybody has any ideas on how to educate more people about The Drill, I’m all ears.)

There are two basic rules to paying the bill when eating out with friends: 

1. Know your portion of the bill (including tax and a 15-20% tip).
2. Carry enough cash to pay for it.

In the event you don’t have enough cash to pay for the meal, you have two options:

1. See if a friend can cover for your portion of the bill with cash (and pay them back immediately with PayPal or some other service that they actually use).
2. Apologize for not having enough cash and request to pay with credit card. (In other words, don’t insist on paying with credit card because it’s “easier.”)

If you’re eating with one other person, it’s acceptable for both of you to pay with credit card and have the restaurant split the bill accordingly. (If it’s an expensive restaurant it’s acceptable to pay with up to 4 credit cards, but only if the bill is split evenly so as to not cause additional friction in the payment process.)

That’s it. It’s not rocket science, but it did require more time and words to write down than I expected…eventually I hope everybody is educated so none of us have to go through that again.  

PS. A few weeks after this incident he paid for another group meal with his credit card (>10 people this time, everybody else paid cash).