“What do you mean?”

“Your blog is the most S blog I’ve ever read,” my friend Tina told me.

“Really?” I wasn’t sure what to make of her comment. “What do you mean?”

To back up a bit, Tina was referencing the fact that I’m a S (sensing: focused on the details) on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and she’s an N (intuitive: focused on the big picture). As I’ve written previously, most of my friends are N’s since I enjoy conversations with people who think differently than me. Despite that, I often find myself asking N friends in conversation exactly what I just asked Tina: “What do you mean?” Either that or I’ll follow-up with, “Can you give me an example of that?”

Tina went on to explain, “Well, most of your blog posts are about your lived experiences, and you tend to go into detail describing the sensory experience. In general though, they usually start out with an idea, followed by clear examples of the idea.”

I was like, “Uhh….yeah. That’s the only way I know how to write.” It’s never occurred to me to describe my blog that way, mainly because I feel like I’m writing for everyone, not just the MBTI sensing types. After thinking about it a bit more, I realized that I also favor material that’s more S in nature. I don’t want to read metaphors and grandiose theories about how the world works. I want to get down to brass tacks and see specific examples of what you’re talking about. In the end, though, I know it’s a matter of preferences and whether you’re an S or N on the Myers-Briggs.

“Plus,” I continued, “if you only talk in metaphors and never explain what you mean, you run the risk of people misinterpreting your work.”

In typical S fashion, I proceeded to give her an example: about a month ago I started playing chess with a friend, who told me, “I feel like the only accurate statement in life is this: chess is life.” At the time we were about to go on a hike so I didn’t ask him what it meant, but in my head I interpreted that to mean, “In life, as in chess, you have to be strategic and plan out your every move if you want to be successful.”

When I saw him later, I asked, “Hey, what did you mean by ‘chess is life?’”

“Oh, I just meant that I really like chess.” (Side note: he’s an ENFP.)

When I told him what I thought he meant, he laughed and acknowledged, “Yeah, it could mean that too.”

Which is why I always try to ask clarifying questions even when I think I know what a person means, and also why I write the way I do.