Are you really going to eat that?

“You’re eating a donut? At this hour?” I asked my roommate, incredulous. I was putting away some dishes before going to bed, and saw the donut by the sink.

My roommate looked at me sheepishly and said, “Don’t judge.”

I rolled my eyes and replied, “Um do you not know me? That’s what I do.”

If you know me, you know that I judge. In particular, you know that I judge you by what you eat. If you like white meat more than dark meat, I don’t take your food opinions seriously. If you eat bagels, I think that you’re making poor life choices. The list goes on…it’s all (well, mostly) in jest, and meant to be funny.

If you know my roommate, you know that he’s very health-conscious. Which is why I was so surprised he was eating a donut late at night. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy donuts as much as the next person, but scientists and doctors everywhere agree that eating late at night is not healthy for you.

Fast forward to a week later, when I got up early one day and decided to make brownies. I decided to use coconut oil, but unfortunately didn’t know that I had to melt it before mixing it with eggs and the powder mix…it was kind of a disaster, so I took a picture and posted it on Facebook.

The responses were actually super helpful, and that’s how I learned I had to melt coconut oil before using it. (Yay Facebook!)

Later that evening, though, a friend replied to the post with a link to a study that correlated getting cancer with eating too much sugar. I was a bit taken aback, but tried to keep it light in my response. Not giving up, they replied again, “Eat fruit for sugar fix.”

For some reason this rubbed me the wrong way (I mean, who does that? On Facebook of all places?) and I wrote this friend an e-mail with a screenshot of the exchange and said something to the effect of, “Hey…maybe Facebook isn’t the best place for these types of comments? It comes across as off-putting…and I was making the brownies for my coworkers anyway…”

In response, the friend deleted the comments, which was fine, but wasn’t necessary.

The next day at work, I walked by a box of donuts and considered getting one, but then immediately thought about how it might cause cancer. Later in the afternoon back at my desk, all I could think about was how there was a glazed donut in that box calling my name, how said donut might kill me, and wasn’t it ironic that the Facebook post that annoyed me might actually be saving my life? (Take note, Alanis Morissette.)

Then I took the donut and ate it.